Naruto Survivor
by CaityAndNaeHeartCookies
Summary: Naruto Survivor...the game show where everything goes...
1. Chapter 1

**IN A PLANE SOMEWHERE...DESERTED YEAH THAT'LL WORK!!**

Nae: Chuck em' off here

Caity:Okie doke **Pulls big lever**

**Naruto characters fall out of some random convieniently placed trap door**

**They land in one ginormous heap! MUAHAHAHA!!**

Naruto: HEY!! WHO'S ARM IS THIS??

Sasuke: mumble muffle (Mine! Your sitting on me dumbass!)

Gaara: NOOOO!! My eyeliner smudged!! OH NO THE APOCALYPSE!!

Sasuke: Mumble muffle muffle (Get off me dobe!)

Naruto: Hey Gaara do you hear something?

Gaara: Nope

Sasuke: Muffle (Bleep you!)

Sakura: Uhm what are you guys doing, oh and Gaara your eyeliner came off

Gaara: NO!! DON'T LOOK AT ME!! **Covers his eyes and runs into a tree**

Sakura: **Prods him with a toe **Eh he'll be fine

Gaara: No I need medical attention

Naruto: Did you here something?

Sakura: uh uh

Sasuke: Mumble (seriously dobe get off me right now or I'm gonna castrate you and Hinata will never get kids!)

Naruto: ACHOO! Whoot someones talking about me!!

Sasuke: Can't...breath...

Naruto: Oh hey Teme why didn't you say something gee whiz

Sasuke: **Big scary Uchiha death glare thingo!!**

Naruto: Eeeep mummy!! **Runs behind Deidara**

Deidara: Dude WTF?!

Gaara: Guys I need medical attention here

Tobi: I IS A GOOD BOY BELIEVE IT!!

Naruto: Get your own crappy catch phrase!!

Tobi: Uhm up, up and away??

Naruto: Yeah sure that'll work

Tobi: UP, UP AND AWAY!! **Jumps off the top off a palm tree**

**BACK IN THE PLANE, WELL THEY'VE LANDED BUT SHUT UP!!**

Nae: So what shall we do to tortur-I mean test them first??

Caity: Uhmm hmmm **Pulls really random looking face**

Nae: What are you doing?

Caity: this is my thinking face!

Nae: Mines better!!

**Has a thinking face competition**

Caity: Uhm we've been doing this for six hours straight maybe we should go tell them why they're here

Nae: Ok **Link arms and skip through the forest singing we're off to see the wizard!!**

**ON THE RANDOM BEACH**

Shino: So what are what are we doing her-

Nae: **Jumps out from behind a palm tree **OOGALA BOOGALA!!

Shino: **Screams like a girl and runs away to hide behind Deidara**

**  
**Deidara: DUDES!! WHY AM I THE HUMAN SHIELD!!

Naruto: I dunno! Maybe it's because your fat and you can sheild us better!!

Deidara: Did..did you just call me FAT?!

Naruto: No no I said Ino is fat

Ino: WHAT?! NARUTO!!

Naruto: No I meant pretty and blonde and sparkling with youth and uhm

Ino: **Cracks knuckles**

Naruto: DEIDARA!!

Deidara: Get yourself a new shield man I'm outta here!

Nae: We are surrounded by water where are you going to go?

Deidara: Up!

Nae: No your not

Deidara: Yes I am

Nae:No your not

Deidara: Yes I am

Nae: No your not. I confiscated your clay after I drugged you, tied you up and put you in the back of a van, which then put you in a plane which is how you ended up here. **Innocent pouting**

Deidara: **Blink blink blink blink **NOOOOO! NOT MY CLAY!! YOU MONSTER!!

Gaara: I wasn't even in this one what is it with you people and blaming me!! Gawd!!

Kankuro: Ok please tell me you did not just quote Napoleon Dynamite!!

Gaara: **Shifty eyes **Nooooo

Temari: I told you not to stay up all night every night! It's not good for you!

Gaara: But Temari!! Without that movie and my eyeliner I'm nothing!!

Kankuro: How hard did he hit his head?

Gaara: On the..heh..good ship...lollipop..it's a sweet...trip to ...the candy..shop hee hee hee

Kankuro: Pretty hard

Gaara: Yo Zetsu **Hugs Zetsu **I love you man your my best friend!!

Zetsu: What the BLEEP!! GET THE BLEEPITY BLEEP BLEEP AWAY FROM ME YOU STUPID LIL' BLEEP!! BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP!!

Gaara: Don't be like that man I love you!

Zetsu: Holy Crapperz!! SOMEBODY KNOCK HIM OUT OR SOMETHING!!

**Gaara is hit by a metal baseball bat**

Tobi: UP.UP AND AWAY!! I is a good boy?

Zetsu: Yes Tobi!! YOUR ARE BETTER THAN BAD YOUR GOOD!!

Tobi: WHOOT UP, UP AND AWAY!!

Nae: I have a feeling I forgot something **Taps chin **What was it? Anvil..hmm check...ball of wool, check! Crazy blonde person..hmmm

Caity: NAE!!

Nae: oh there it is! Check! Hehe oopsies

Caity: I was kidnapped by savages you said you were going for help where in the BLEEP! Have you been this whole Bleepin time? For the love of bleep!!

Nae: Hah hah Funny story ya see I forgot?

Caity: I am so not talking to you, Anyway your here because we have basically forced you to participate in Naruto survivor, because we needed cheap entertainment and we don't have to pay you suckers NOTHING!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Gaara: That's it I am so calling my agent, I'm certain that this is a breach of my contract

Caity: Dial that number and we'll cancel your life subscription to Maybelline!

Gaara: Aw man fine then you bully-head!

Caity: Anyways you'll be in four groups: yellow, blue, red and GREEN!! but not just any green FLURO GREEN!! uhm what was I saying again..oh yeah right and then pit you against each other in a series of challenging, random and probably-make-no-sense mission/task thingos!! In which the winner gets absolutely NOTHING!! MUAHAHAHA!!

Kiba: Now thats unfair man

Neji: Yeah thats so not excellent!

Caity: Humph fine you can...uhm..get a say in who gets voted off but you have to have two good reasons!

Kiba and Neji: EXCELLENTNESS!!

Everyone: O.O

Nae: First team YELLOW! Sasuke, Naruto, Neji, Gaara, Itachi, Sakura and Kiba!!

Caity: BLUE!! Kisame, Tenten, Choji, Shino, Zetsu, Tobi and Deidara!

Nae: FLURO GREEN!! Ino, Hinata, Lee, Shikamaru, Kankuro, Temari and Sasori!

Caity: Oh yeah we're not doing red, we didn't kidnap enough of you...

Nae: Yeah next time we'll kidnap all the Sensei's too MUWAHAHA!!

Caity: YUSH!! USING THE POWER OF THE NINJA FURBIES!!

Nae: AND THE CHOPSTICKS!! DUN DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNN!!

All: O.O

Caity: What thats our world domination plan!

Nae: Yeah!! It's better than anything you guys thought of!!

Caity: Damn straight!!

Naruto: Well what do we do now

Caity: Well thats end of this episode!! Tune in next time!! SERIOUSLY!!

Nae: YEAH!!

Naruto: **Sweatdrop**

Caity: See ya next time

Nae: Buh bye!!

**Insert cool theme music here!!**

Yeah we were bored again and I just randomly thought of this. I would never have wrote it but Nae was being annoying and made me write it while she sat there and gave critisi-I mean ideas Lol. I'm kinda glad she did!! Anyways if we get 10 reviews we shall continue, I'm not just gonna type if no one will read it, I have a life you know! CoOkIeS!!


	2. Chapter 2

I apologise for all my spelling mistakes in advance!! I still don't own Naruto...tear tear...

Hello and welcome to another exciting installment of Naruto Survivor!! (Silence)...I said...Naruto Survivor!! (More silence)...NAE!! Play the damn theme song!!** Nae: Ooops!! **Never mind!! just roll the tape!!

**At the Yellow Base**

Naruto: WOOT!! I AM SO READY FOR THIS I AM GONNA KICK ASS AND BECOME THE KING OF ENGLAND!! BELIEVE IT!!

Neji: Dude, the king of England??

Naruto: Yeah

Kiba: I thought you wanted to be the Hokage dude?

Naruto: Yeah well..that too!

Neji and Kiba: O.O

Sasuke: So Itachi..

Itachi: Uhm hi?

Sasuke: Where are my oreos?

Itachi: **Shifty eyes **I have no idea what your talking about

Sasuke: I think you do

Itachi: Yeah well I know that I don't

Sasuke: **Reaches into Itachi's pocket and pulls out a packet of oreos **Well then whats this??

Itachi: **Shifty eyes **Thats erm not uh mine

Sasuke: 5...4...3...2...

Itachi: Oh frozen fishsticks!

Sasuke: 1!

Itachi: ARGH!! **Runs all the way to the blue base and hides behind Deidara**

Sasuke: Muahahahahahhahaha

Sakura: Well Gaara you reapplied your eyeliner I see

Gaara: Hey shut up

Sakura: Thats mean!!

Gaara: I don't care!! GAWD!!

Sakura: O.o

Gaara: ehehehe

**At the Blue Base**

Deidara: Aw man, used as a shield again?

Itachi: Mummy!!

Deidara: I aint your mummy!!

Itachi: HELP ME!!

Deidara: Ew no get away from me man! TOBI KNOCK HIM OUT!!

Tobi: Yes sir!! **Hits itachi with the metal base ball bat **UP, UP AND AWAY!!

Itachi: **Groans**

Deidara: Oh no quick he's waking up what do we do?!

Kisame: Draw on his face..

Shino: Put bugs in his underwear..

Choji: Munch munch

Tenten: Let me cut his hair pwease? **Evil grin **

Everyone else: O.O

Tenten: Aw you guys are no fun!!

Itachi: **Groans**

Deidara: I say we take him to the Savages!!

Tobi: Oh pick me!! I know!! PICK ME!!

Deidara: Yes what is it Tobi??

Tobi: I'll do it **Grabs Itachi's ankle and drags him away through the trees**

Deidara: **Blink blink** I think Tobi finally got revenge on Itachi for all the Halloween mask jokes

Zetsu: Yeah..they're really corny

Tenten: Really?? Tell us one

Deidara: NO!! IT'S A CRIME TO REPEAT THEM!!

Shino: Wow..

Choji: Munch

Tobi: **Far off yelling **UP,UP AND AWAY!! WE'RE HAVING CHICKEN TONIGHT CHICKEN TONIGHT YEAH!!

**At the Fluro Green Base**

Sasori: Aw man I got the loser group..

Hinata: W-we-ll I-

Sasori: I'm finished!! It's all over I'm gonna lose!!

Hinata: S-s-sas-ori I-

Sasori: We're DOOMED!!

Hinata: S-sa-

Sasori: DOOMED I SAY DOOMED!!

Hinata: FOR THE LOVE OF CHEDDAR CHEESE SHUT UP!!

Sasori: OO

Hinata: THANK YOU!! As I was saying I think we can do it! Right Ino?

**Silence**

Hinata: Ino?

Ino: Go fish

Hinata: Wha?

Ino: Do you have a four? **Continues playing card game with a frog**

Hinata: I said right Ino?!

Ino: Huh oh yeah sure Hinata, WAIT WHAT HOW DID YOU BEAT ME AGAIN!!

Frog: Ribbit

Ino: I hate you!!

Lee: YOUTHY YOUTH YOUTHFULNESS OF THE YOUTHY YOUTH OF THE YOUTHFULL TOMORROW!!

Shikamaru: **Snore**

Kankuro: Yo Temari I'm telling ya there's something wrong with Racoon boy

Temari: He's just having a midlife crisis! Besides I like him better this way

Gaara: **Far off yelling **SUNSHINE, LOLLIPOPS AND RAINBOWS!!

Kankuro: Oh man

Temari: AWWW!!

Kankuro: Thats just so not cool!!

Temari: Your just jealous cos' fans like him better and he gets more lines than you!!

Gaara: Yeah!!

Temari: See?! Wait! Who what when why where how!!

Gaara: **Blink blink **Nice to see you too Temari, Well Cheerio!! **Skips away**

Kankuro: SEE!! He's a PANSY!! My reputation is RUINED!! SOMEONE KILL ME NOW!!

**Tobi pops up out of nowhere**

Tobi: **Hits Kankuro on the head with a baseball bat **That can be arranged

Temari: No!! Go on scram!!** Chases Tobi away with a random broom**

Tobi: Fine!! **Leaves**

**MEGA PHONE SPEAKER THINGO: **Hello peoples, this is Caity! I want all of you to meet at the beach where you first landed!! We have a surprise for you!! Thank you and have a safe day!!

**At the Random Beach **

Caity: You may be wondering why your here and what your surprise is well.. Nae bring it out!!

Nae: Huff..this thing is sooo heavy why did I have to carry it!! **Drags a giant box behind her**

Caity: Thats payback for leaving me with the savages!!

Nae: Hehehehe..classic!

Caity: Anyway! I now present the red team!!** Opens the box and Kakashi, Kurenai, Gai, Asuma, Anko, Karin and Sai fall out.**

Nae: Geez you people need Jenny Craig!

Kakashi: Hey!!

Gai: What?

Kakashi: Someone stole my wallet!!

Caity: Ehehehe here **Hands him back his wallet**

Kakashi: You theiferer!!

Caity: HEY!! I'll evict you before we even begin alright!!

Kakashi: Sowwy

Nae: Ok moving on!! Your task today is a scavenger hunt!! Here are your lists **Hands them all their lists**

Caity: On your marks, Get set...CHEESE!! I mean uh GO!!

**Everyone takes off running in different directions.**

**With the Red Team**

Kakashi: Ok first on the list is..a microwave??

Gai: Yosh how youthfull!!

Kakashi: Yeah..coughGAYcough!!

Gai: What was that Kakashi?

Kakashi: Nothing lets just find this microwave!

Anko: You heard him maggots!!

Karin: Why am I even here??

Sai: Cos' Caity and Nae hate you and want to make you suffer

Karin: Oh ok...WAIT WHAT THE BLEEP!!

Kurenai: Watch your mouth missy!!

Asuma: Kurenai, your not her mother!!

Kurenai: WHAT WAS THAT!! YOU WANT SOME OF THIS!! HUH PUNK??

Asuma: N-no S-s-s-s-s-sorry!!

Kurenai: Thats what I thought!!

Anko: OK NOW LETS GO!!

Red team excluding Anko: **Sweatdrop**

**With the Yellow team**

Sasuke: You dobe, you got us lost!!

Naruto: Uh uh your the one who didn't want to stop and ask for directions!!

Sasuke: There's no-one to ask!!

Naruto: I could've asked the monkey!! I'm fluent in Monkeyese!!

Sasuke: **Blink blink**

Naruto: What?? I took a course in summer school, it was that or **Shudder**...BALLET!!

Sasuke: heh heh I can imagine you in a pink tutu dobe!

Naruto: Shut up shut up shut up!! **Tackles him**

Sakura: Thats enough! **Grabs them both by one ear and seperates them **Your both on a time out!!

Sasuke: **Folds his arms **Hmph!

Naruto: **Sticks his tongue out at Sasuke **Meh!!

Sasuke: **Narrows his eyes**

Sakura: You two being childish won't get us anywhere now we have to find..A pair of chopsticks??

Neji: Can we just like find this stuff dude!! My hair is starting to frizz!

Kiba: Totally not excellent!!

Gaara: **Sings **Lollipop, lollipop, Ooo lolli lolli lolli lollipop!!

Itachi: OW!! MY EARS ARE BLEEDING SOMEONE PUT THE DYING DOG OUT OF IT'S MISERY BEFORE I DIE OF BLOOD LOSS!!

Gaara: Grr **Glares at Itachi**

Itachi: Eeep!!

Kiba: Hey I just noticed something where's the little dude that sits on my head?

Neji: You mean the fluffy white thing right?

Kiba: Yeah..

Neji: Uhm Akamaru?

Kiba: Oh yeah I wonder where Akamaru is?

**Outside Kiba's house**

Akamaru: Arf arf arf (I know I peed on your shoes but please let me in!)

**Silence**

Akamaru: Arf arf arf arfity arfy arf! (Hello?? Buttface?? I'm getting hungry here!!)

**Silence**

Akamaru: Arf arf arfy arfity arfy arfity! ( Fine!! Be that way I want a divorce and I get half of everything!!)

**Silence**

Akamaru: Arf (Good! Hmph I'm leaving)

**Back with the Yellow Team**

Neji: Yeah I wonder..

Kiba: Oh well the little dude will be ok

**With the Fluro Green Team**

Hinata: Hmm well the first thing in our list is..A furby??

Ino: Aww I love those things they're soooo cute!!

Sasori: They're ugly

Ino: **Cracks knuckles **What did you say?

Sasori: I agree??

Ino: Good!! **Grins**

Sasori: **Mutters **Mood swings..

Ino: WHAT?! **Attacks him**

**Five minutes later**

Sasori: **Groan**..ow

Ino: Hmph serves you right

Shikamaru: Woah..I'm glad she wasn't beating me up...troublesome

Temari: STOP IT IF I HEAR TROUBLESOME ONE MORE TIME I'M GOING TO BARF!!

Shikamaru: Troub-

Temari: Don't.Say.It!!

Shikamaru: -lesome!

Temari: RAWR!!

Kankuro: **Holds Temari back **Tem calm down we need to concentrate so we can win and I can prove to everyone watching that I'm better than Gaara!!

Temari: I'd say that the second part is impossible but I agree with the first part we need to win!!

Kankuro: Exactly-AYE!!

Temari: Heh heh

Kankuro: **Pouts **Your mean!!

Temari: Yep get used to it!!

Lee: YOSH!! LET US TAKE ADVANTAGE OF OUR YOUTH AND WIN!!

Everyone else: OO

**With the Blue Team**

Tenten: We need to find uhm a blue fish!!

**Everyone looks at Kisame**

Kisame: What?? Oh uh uh I am not a FISH!! Stop looking at me like THAT!!

Choji: **Drool **You look like a fish to me a yummy yummy fish!! SUSHI!!

Kisame: Oh man why does this always happen to me..

**Flashba-**

Deidara: No dude no flashbacks!!

**Flash-**

Deidara: Kisame!! I said NO!!

**Flas-**

Deidara: KISAME!!

Kisame: Fine you spoilsport!!

Zetsu: Uhm guys we need to get started now we're really behin-

Tobi: UP,UP AND AWAY!!

Zetsu: Ok Tobi you need a new catch phrase cos' that one's really starting to piss me off!!

Tobi: Okies!! How about POWER TO THE PANCAKES!! I like that one!!

Zetsu: Whatever as long as it's not that other one it's fine by me

Shino: Hey guys did you know that cri-

Tenten: NO MORE USELESS BUG INFO!!

Shino: But it's interesting-

Tenten: Uh uh

Shino: But they-

Tenten: uh uh

Shino: it's just that-

Tenten: UH UH!!

Shino: Fine then lets get going

**On the random beach**

Caity: So Nae how do you think that they're going?

Nae: I dunno but I think I could beat all of them!!

Caity: **Sarcasm **Sure you could..

Nae: Thanks for your support Caity!!

Caity: **Rolls eyes**

Nae: I'll pretend I didn't see that..Ok thats our second episode of Naruto Survivor tune in next time!!

Caity: Yeah review and tell us who should win the scavenger hunt, also tell us who you want to evict!! Votes close..uhm...when do the votes close?

Nae: Votes close on the 27th of october 2008!!

Caity: Yeah what she said THANK YOU FOR READING, WE LOVE YOU ALL GOOD NIGHT!!

Nae: Buh-bye **Awesome** **theme music plays!! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Tehe, sorry its so late peoples. That is because I, Nae, wrote this one myself (since Caity wrote the second one, she's better at writing these then me, but meh, I'll live....maybe....) and I'm completely and utterly unreliable, forgetful and late -_-**

ON THE RANDOM BEACH

Nae: **digging around in bushes** OMG!!! CAITY!!! Guess what I found!!!

Caity: Your brain....

Nae: Err...no...Wait WHAT???

Caity: **Pokes tongue**

Nae: **Glares** Actually...I found a cookie!!!

Caity: WHAT!!!! **runs faster then humanly possible and picks up cookie**

**A concealed trap door opens and Caity and Nae fall into oblivion...**

WHERE EVER THE TEAMS HAVE GATHERED FOR THE ELIMINATION

Naruto: Aren't Caity and Nae supposed to be here?

Shino: Meh, who cares-?

Nae: **Runs out from bushes covered in spearheads, shards from hand grenades and whatever else Savages use these days** HELP!!!! **Hides behind Deidara**

Deidara: Hmph!! What do you guys think I am!!! I am not a fricken shield for bleeps sake, you'd think I have a sign on my back saying "I am a sheild!!! RAWR!!!!

Tobi:** Points** Hehe, actually you do...

Deidara: RAWR!!! Who put that there!!!

Sasuke: **shifty eyes ** Uhhhh...Itachi!

**Deidara tackles Itachi, who is completely oblivious to what's going on, the poor fella...Nah, not really, muwahaha**

Tenten: Uuummm....anyways, where's Caity, and what happened to you???

Nae: Well....

FLASHBA-

Deidara: **Jumps up to tackle Nae, but flips over a log instead** NOOO!! NO BLEEPIN FLASHBACK!!

Nae: HAH!! **points and laughs**

Kisame: Yeah, I wasnt allowed one...

Nae: To bad...Im writing this story so I can do what I want!! Now where was I? Oh yes...

FLASH-

Deidara: NOO- **gets knocked out by celery stick**

Everyone else: 0.0

Nae: Ok...try agian...

FLASHBACK

_Well, it was a bright and sunny day, when suddenly, out of the bushes, a evil cookie , the size of a horse!...no wait, scratch that...the size of an ELEPHANT!, jumped out and said " RAWR!!! YOU ATE MY FRIEND THE CUCUMBER! FOR THAT YOU DIE!" Then, it started chasing us! We went AAAHHHH!!! And we ran and ran......._

**2 hours later....**

_THEN!! There were aliens!! And they zoomed out and sucked us up with there little laser beam thing and-_

END FLASHBACK

Nae: **rubbing head** Oi...what was that for....I was on a roll!!

Caity: **Twirling zucchini in hand** Well, first off, that is NOT what happened. Second, whilst you were busy having a flashback, you didnt notice that you are about to fall off a cliff!

Nae: Oh, why thank you Caity...wait a minute....I was in the middle of the island..how did that cliff get there....

Caity: **shifty eyes** Moving on...Okie dokies artichokies!!

Everyone else: 0.0

Sakura: **whispers to Ino** Did she just call me an artichokie?...grr...

Caity: First off, who was successful in finding their object??

Naruto: **whips out a pair of plastic, blue chopsticks from.....I'd prefer not to say...**

Caity:.....0.0 RAWR!!! **Pounces on Naruto**

Naruto: AAAHHHH!!!!!

Everyone else: 0.0

Caity: THOSE ARE MY CHOPSTICKS!!!!!!!! I HAD TO EAT WITH A SPOON, A SPOON I TELL YOU!!! RAAHHH!!! **continues ranting about how she couldnt eat with chopsticks, blah blah**

Gaara: On..the good ship...lollipop..hehe...its a sweet....trip to...hee...the candy SHOP!! WOOOHOOO!!! **Caity continues ranting**

Itachi: GAAHH, HE IS SINGING AGAIN!! TOBI!!!

Tobi: POWER TO THE PANCAKES!!! Did someone call??

Itachi: Tobi, knock out the annoying redhead over there!!

Nae: 0.0 **hides behind Deidara, who just woke up**

Deidara: I give up...-_-

Tobi: **Runs over to where Itachi pointed and knocks out....Sasori...** POWER TO THE PANCAKES!!! I IS A GOOD BOY!!

Itachi: Wrong redhead.... **Caity is still ranting...** Actually, change of target Tobi, shut HER UP!! **points at Caity**

Tobi: **Ebilll grin**

Caity: **Stops ranting and glares at Itachi**

Nae: I think it would be best if we cut to a commercial....

COMMERCIAL

_Commercial dude: Always wanted to be able to come out with cool catch phrases, but absolutely suck at it?? Well then, you need "TOBIS GUIDE TO CATCH PHRASES!"!!_

_With over 95757438394 phrases, your sure to find one that suits your needs!!_

**record scratch**

BACK TO NARUTO SURVIVOR

Lee: WELCOME BACK ALL MY YOUTHYFULL YOUTHY FRIENDS!! YOUTHY YOUTH YOUTH YOUTHFULNESS!!! YOUT-

Nae: Oh shuddup.... Ok, time to get on with it. Could anyone that Caity hasnt killed on the blue team please bring fourth your object!

Shino: **drags an unconscious Kisame up to the platform** Yep ^^ OMG!!!! **Jumps down onto the ground** Its a rare Oberea oculata!!! This creature -

Nae: **Treds on what you and I would call a beetle** Whatever...Wait, you would have been one of the first on Caitys hit-list, how did you-

Shino: MONSTER!!!! HOW COULD YOU!!!!

Gaara: X.X **still** **knocked out from Caitys rampage, therefore cannot react to the word monster**

Shino: **Still ranting on about how Nae stepped on the beetle**

Caity: **takes** **a deep breath......and knocks Shino over the head with Tobis bat** Ok...now what about the FLURO GREEN!! team?

Lee: YOUTHY, OH HOW YOUTHFUL!!! SINCE I AM THE ONLY YOUTHFUL MEMBER OF MY YOUTHYNESS TEAM THAT IS YOUTHFULLY ALIVE AND YOUTHFUL, WE.........FAILED!!! **anime tears** IT IS SOOO UNYOUTHFULL!! OH THE SHAME!!! WHERE HAS ALL THE YOUTHY YOUTH YOUTHFULNESS GONE!! I AM SO SORRY GAI-SENSEI!! I WILL NEVER BE AS YOUTHFUL AS YOU ARE!!! **more anime tears**

Caity: They couldnt find a fricken furby....Where did you hide it Nae?

Nae: Oh....I was supposed to hide it? I thought that for once you were being a loving friend and gave me an extremely late birthday present! I even named it.....FELCH!!

Caity: Uhhhhh...Nae...you do know what that word means dont you.....

Nae: Nup! I saw it in one of the books Kakashi was reading, and thought it was a cool word!!

Caity: Oh god...Why do I have to work with her again??

Nae: BECAUSE I AM AWESOME!!!!! WOOHOOO!!! **runs around like a loony**

Caity: **sigh** Just change your furbies name..... please.....Ok..last team.....is no where to be seen.....hmmm....(Omg, that rhymes!!!)

Everyone else: 0.o

WHEREVER THE RED TEAM IS

Sai: **Tip-toeing from tree to tree, whispering** If you go out in the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise......

Asuma: I swear, we passed that tree 5 times!!!

Anko: MAGGOT!! I TOLD YOU YOU HAD THE MAP UPSIDE DOWN!!

Sai: **Darts from one side of the path to the other** If you go out in the woods today, you'd better go in disguise......

Kurenai: Maybe we had better spilt up?

Gai: WHAT A YOUTHFUL IDEA YOUTHFUL KURENAI!!!

Sai: **creeps onto a pile of rocks** For every bear that ever there was,will gather there for certain, because....

Kakashi: **reading his book...pauses..** BLEEEEP BLEEP BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE THE BLEEP IS PAGE 267!!! BLEEP BLEEP BLEEEEEP!!!!

Karin: **snickers**

Sai: **Jumps down from the rocks in front of the group, who until then hadnt noticed him** TODAYS THE DAY THE TEDDY BEARS HAVE THEIR PIIIIIIIIIIIIIC NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone else: **Faints from fright** X.X

Sai: Guys, I was only joking!!! There arent any bears here sillies!!

BACK AT THE CLEARING - EVERYONE HAD WOKEN BACK UP BTW

Naruto: 1...2...3...4...5...6...11...22...hmmm, SOMEONE IS MISSING, BELIEVE IT!!!

Kiba: Dude, thats so not excellent!! Ok, dudes, if your not here, raise your hand!

**Silence**

Neji: Excellent, everyone is here and stuff...

Sakura: **sigh** Idiots...of course someone cant raise their hand if they aren't here!

Neji: **squeals like a girl** DUDE!!!! I GOT A GREY HAIR MAN!!!!

Kankuro: So not excellent man....

Neji & Kiba: 0.o.....no dude...no....dont even try.....JINX!!

Ino: **rolls eyes** So..whose missing....

Temari: HINATA!!!!

**Dun dun dunnnnn music plays**

Tenten: Where did that come from?

Caity: Nae...put the radio away....

Nae: Aaawww...I had always wanted to do that....

Choji: munch munch munch... Hey, have you guys ever tasted these?? They are pickle and salami flavoured....quite yum actually...

Everyone else: Eeewwww.....

Kiba & Neji: JINX!!

Tenten: Choji...dont change the subject....So, where is she?

Nae & Caity: We killed her and ate her liver..

Caity: Ok Nae, now you play the music....

**Dun dun dunnnn music plays**

Everyone else: 0.o

Caity: Just joking....Actually, she has been eliminated!! We thought it would be best to do it secrectly so as not to cause a commotion....And I supppose I had better announce the winner of the scavenger hunt! Nae, drum roll!

**Drum roll music plays**

Caity:........YELLOW!!!!

Yellow Team: WOOHOOOO!!!!!

Deidara: Wait a second.....Both the yellow team and our team completed the scavenger hunt, what about us?

Caity: **thunder crash** Are you opposing my desicion???

Deidara: Eeepp! **runs and hides behind Zetsu**

Zetsu: Just because people use you as a human shield.....

Deidara: Yeah, well its your turn!

Itachi: Wait, didnt you say that the winners get to choose who gets voted off? So that means -

Nae: Well, thats all for today folks! I hope you enjoyed it!!

Caity: We would also like to say a special thank you to bunnyofawesomeness and our friend Natasha, for being the only people who voted! WE LOVE YOU!! FREE COOKIES!!!

Gaara: NOOO!!! MY COOKIES!!! **tackles Caity**

Nae: Well, tune in next time!! The teams will be participating in another completely random, utterly useless mission!!! MUWAHAHAHA!!!!

Caity: Tata!!!


	4. Chapter 4

It is I the ever-awesomer-than-Nae CAITY!! Thats right I am back!! Bwahahaha! Anywhoozle on with the episode!!And also I absolutely positutely do not own naruto, buzz lightyear, Maybelline or star wars in any way, shape or form!! Enjoy!

Nae: Hello and welcome to **Dun dun dunnnnn music plays **Naruto Survivor where your worst fears are realised and I shall KILL YOU AL-

Caity: Nae what are you doing?

Nae: Uhm nothing?

Caity: **Shrugs **Whatever it's time to go and give them their new tort-I mean test eheh so turn off the teletubbies and lets go!

Nae: But it was just getting good..

Caity: Now or no more coke

Nae: Ok ok but please please don't hurt the precious coke please

Caity: Yeah sure......idiot

Nae: Huh what?

Caity: Nothing lets go!

RANDOM BEACH PLACE

Itachi: You know what I just realised...aren't I like supposed to be all evil and mean and stuff?

Sasuke: YOU ARE EVIL YOU FOOL!!! I WANT MY OREOS DAMNIT!!!

Itachi: **Ignores Sasuke completely **

Sasuke: Hey stop ignoring me I WILL KILL YOU RAWR!!

Neji: Look dudes this is all like pointless and stuff lets all just calm down ok

Kiba: Yeah..

Tobi: POWER TO THE PANCAKES!!!

Shino: Guess what my shoes are just sooooo coo-

Nae: LAAAAAAAAAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shino: Awwww

Nae: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Caity: NUHAHAHAHA!!

Lee: YOUTHAHAHAHA!!

Naruto: O_O

Lee: What I wanted a cool laugh too..

Naruto: Okkkkk...**backs away slowly**

Gai: Don't worry my ever youthful Lee I thought your youthful display was very..uhm...Youthy!!

Lee: Oh Thankyou Gai-Sensei I have the greatest respect for you! You are truly awesome!!

Kakashi: Now why can't Sasuke be like that?

Sasuke: **O_O **B-be L-L-Like that???? **Faints**

Caity: **Pokes Sasuke with an orange glowstick **

Nae: Ok your next task is to..is to..to uhm..

Caity: YOU MUST MAKE IT THROUGH A MAZE!! **Pumps fist in the air**

Everybody else: **Sweatdrop**

Caity: The maze of doom?

**Silence**

Caity: The maze of destruction?

**Silence**

Caity: You know what I give up theres just no pleasing you people is there!!!

Nae: Nup! Anyways in the middle of the maze is your prize! a piece of paper!

Caity: A WHOLE PIECE OF PAPER WOW!!!

Nae: Yup!

Naruto: Awesome!

Tobi: POWER TO THE YOUTHFUL PANCAKES!!

Lee/Gai: HEY THATS OUR WORD!!!

Tobi: Aw snapperz

Caity: AND THATS MY WORD!!!

Tobi: Fozen fishsticks?

Itachi: THATS MINE!!

Nae: Tobi can't you think of anything original

Tobi: To infinite and beyond?

Caity: Isn't that Buzz Lightyea-You know what never mind, just get in the maze!!

Deidara: **Hides behind Zetsu **Scary...

Caity: Get your ass in the maze NOW!!

Naruto Characters: Eeeep **Run into the maze**

Nae: OH BY THE WAY WE PUT SOME SAVAGES AND WILD ANIMALS IN THERE TO MAKE IT MORE CHALLENGING!!!

INSIDE THE MAZE

YELLOW TEAM

Naruto: Ok so we go left, then right or was it right then left...or maybe straight, then left, right, left?

Sakura: You are officially stupid

Naruto: Why thank you

Sasuke: Oh my golly gosh what is that? **Points at a strange looking thing with a shell**

Itachi: That my dear little brother would be a....turtle...

Sasuke: Oh thats ok the-

Itachi: A vicious socially-retarded-person-eating turtle!!

Sasuke: ARGH!!!!!

Itachi: hehehe

Turtle: (insert whatever sound a turtle makes here)

Sasuke: Oh gawd help me I promise I'll start believing in you and I'll offer you this sacrifice! **Holds Naruto up to the sky**

Naruto: Ooo a sacrifice, thats sounds special!!! HEY GUYS I'M A SACRIFICE!!

Sakura: Uhm Naruto that's not a good thing..

Naruto: Oh if ever oh ever a sacrifice there was, I am one because because because!!! because of the awesome stuff I does!!

Turtle: **Blinks**

Sasuke: Oh NO!! IT BLINKED!! THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US SAVE THE WOMEN AND THE CHIL-

Naruto: I AM THE SACRIFICE!!

UHM TO THE RED TEAM!

Sai: ok I really wanna win this one so I can use that piece of paper and draw something!!

Karin: Yeah yeah whatever

Anko: CHYEAH AREN'T YOU ALL JUST SOOOOOOOO EXCITED I AM LETS MOVE OUT TROOPS!!!

Kakashi: WTF?!?!

Gai: Youth what a youthy youth motivation speech to activate the youth stored deep inside our youthy souls OH THE YOUTHFULLNESS OF IT ALL!!!

Asuma: Look I have been putting up with this for like 14 days .!!

Kurenai: **Sweatdrop**

Asuma: I'.LOOPY!!

Kakashi: uhm..

Karin:...and so I was all like no rabbit-butt Sasuke-kun is like so mine and then she was all like no way and I was all like yes way and she was like no way and so I was all like-

Sai: Oh my god SHUT UP WOMAN!!

Karin:...

Asuma: Thankyou Sai THANKYOU!!!

Gai: LET US YOUTHFULLY EMBARK ON THIS YOUTHY ADVENTURE AND FULLY EMBRACE THIS CHANCE TO LET OUR INNER YOUTH SHINE!!

Kakashi: uhm sure ok..

THE BLUE TEAM (hehehe..blue..)

Kisame: **Sings** Letsname the species, the species, the species, Lets name the species that live in the sea! Theres-

Deidara: ARGH MY EARS!!!!! OWCH!! SAVE ME FROM THE EAR RAPIST!!

Kisame: WHAT?!?!?

Deidara: You heard me you ear rapist!!!

Kisame: I AM NOT! IT'S CALLED SINGING!!

Deidara: Oh is that what you call it? Ear rapist!

Shino: Hey guys did you know that a cockroach can liv-

Tenten: Shaddup already geez! What did I say about the useless bug info!!

Shino: hehehe oh well at least my shoes are still coo-

Nae: **Far off yelling **LAAAAAAAME!!!

Shino: Aw crud!

Tobi: Hey guys what's that thing? **Points at a figure in the distance**

Tenten: Well Tobi thats a-

TO THE FLURO GREEN TEAM

Tenten: YOU CUT ME OFF!!!

Caity: Deal with it anyway-

Tenten: NO!!

Caity: Fine finish your stupid sentence!!

Tenten: Thankyou....ahem..Well Tobi thats a SAVAGE!!RUN FOR IT!!!!

**They all run away..yes even Choji...**

TO THE FLURO GREEN TEAM THIS TIME FOR REALZ!!

Sasori: I know I have a plan..**Whispers inaudibly**

Ino: Thats CRAZY!!

Temari: Yeah how is you stealing/eating all the fairy floss in the world going to get us to the center of the maze?

Kankuro: Yeah, yeah, yeah. How, how, how?? I really, really, really need to beat Gaara and prove to everyone once and for all that I am the superior sand sibling!!

Sasori: **Blink blink **Oh you wanted a plan to get to the middle of the maze..uhm I got nothing..

Lee: I know I can just use the power of my youth to quickly locate the center of the maze and we'll be there in no time.....IT'S THIS WAY FOLLOW ME YOUTHFUL FRIENDS!!

TWO HOURS LATER

Lee: It's just around this corner..

Temari: You've said that for the last 45'678 corners!

Lee: Well I'm sure it's this one this time

Kankuro: Yeah you said that last time, and the time before that, and the time before that, and guess what you even said it the time before that and yo-

Frog: Ribbit!!

Ino: So your back to challenge me aye? Think you can get the best of me eh mate? Well no-one beats Ino Yamanaka so if your here for a rematch lets go right here right nowjust you and me froggie!!

Frog: Ribbit ribbit

Ino: No your mum smells like banana's!!!

Frog: Ribbit?

Ino: Oh is that right!!! Eh mate???

Frog: Ribb-

Ino: WHY YOU LIL!! **Starts to strangle the frog**

Sasori: I have a plan everyone...

Ino: **Drops frog **What is it?

Sasori: well....we just walk until we find it! **Grins**

Ino: **Falls over**

Shikamaru: That was your brilliant plan? It took you this long to come up with that?

Sasori: Yeah..

Ino: You were right before Sasori, we are DOOMED!!

Frog: Ribbit!

Ino: HEY !! YOU STAY OUT OF IT!!!

Frog: Ribby ribb!

Ino: YEAH WELL WHO ASKED YOU!!!

Frog: Ribbit!!

Ino: You win this round but we will meet again!! MARK MY WORDS EVIL FROG MARK MY WORDS!!!

Kankuro: Yeah ok Ino...

Ino: YOU WANNA START SOMETHING TOO!!

Kankuro: n-n-no

Ino: Good!!

Frog: Ribbit

Ino: Grrr **Eye twitches**

**Frog hops away**

Ino: YEAH YOU BETTER RUN BUDDY!!!

OUTSIDE THE MAZE

Caity: Hey nae?

Nae: Yeah

Caity: Wheres Gaara?

**Gaara walks out of the trees**

Caity: And where have you been mister??

Gaara: Well I broke into your secret base here on the island and I ate your super-secret-uber-duberly-well-hidden stash of cookies!

Caity: WHAT!?!?!?!?!??!

Nae: Uh oh..

Caity: GAARA!!!

Gaara: **Pulls a really serious face and looks at the camera, flicking his hair **Maybe she's born with it.....maybe its maybelline!

Nae: What the crap? Where'd that come from?

Gaara: I dunno **Shrugs**

Caity: That was really weird...in fact I even forgot why I wanted to kill you

Gaara: hehehe

Caity: WAIT!! WHERE ARE MY COOKIES!!!

Gaara: Shino took them!!

Caity: Ooo Shino is going down now!! **Cracks knuckles**

Nae: Well seeing as how Caity is about to go beat the living snot out of Shino I suppose I should end the show and tell you all to review!!! Again tell us who you want to win and who you wanna vote out votes close on 11th of November 2008!!

Caity: Buh bye now.....shino!

Gaara: Bye...Ooo look a muffin...May the force be with you!


	5. Chapter 5

**Heh heh we are back again!!! And just when you thought you got rid of us!!! MUAHAHAHA!!!! YOU FOOLS!! HAHAHAH!!! ok I'll start the story now sheesh!**

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Caity: **Coughs and shuffles some random papers on her random desk ** First up on our show tonight..Will you be eaten by a turtle..Full story in just a moment-

Nae: **Randomly pops up **Caity what are you doing?

Caity: Nothin.. **Shifty eyes**

Nae: Yeah sure you weren't... How long have they been in the maze?

Caity: uh times the two...carry the seven...divide 1...uhm two weeks!

Nae: Oh brother, I thought I told you to get them out

Caity: Yeah well don't look at me I told Barry to do it **Points at the pair of scissors on her desk** DAMNIT BARRY WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM THEY COULD ALL BE DEAD AND IT WILL BE ALL YOUR FAULT YA HEAR!!

Nae: YEAH BARRY GEEZ!!

**Barry/The scissors runs away**

Caity: Feh good riddance

Nae: Lets get on with it shall we?

Caity: Yes lets

**In the middle of the maze**

Lee: HAH!! I TOLD YOU YOUTH WOULD PREVAIL!!! I GET THE PIECE OF PAPER!! OH HOW YOUTHY!!

Kankuro: Yeah yeah whatever..on to more important matters I HAVE FINALLY SHOWN THE WORLD THAT I AM SUPERIOR TO GAARA IN EVERY WAY, SHAPE AND FORM BAHAHAHHAHA!!

Temari: Oh geez I'll never hear the end of this!

Ino: Haha Temari!!

Temari: Shaddup Frog-girl

Ino: Yeah well your a stupid blonde!!

**Everyone else sweatdrops**

Sasori: Uhm Ino you are a blonde..

Ino: Oh yeah I guess I am..

Sasori: Hey weren't there six of us before?

Temari: Oh yeah wait where's the troublesome? Omg we forgot Shikamaru!!

**Meanwhile in a random hole**

Shikamaru: **Snore mumble snore **No Temari keep that whisk away from me!..Troublesome.. **Snore mumble mumble snore**

**Back with Fluro green**

Sasori: Eh I suppose we should go back now..

Ino: Yeah I guess

Lee: YOUTHY YOUTHFULNESS PREVAILED OH GAI-SENSEI I HOPE I HAVE WON YOUR YOUTHY APPROVAL!!

Ino: **0_o**

**With the Yellow Team**

Sasuke: **Hiding behind Sakura **Is it gone?

Itachi: **Grabs Sasuke **Rahh!!

Sasuke: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh **Jumps bridal style into Sakura's arms**

Sakura: **Drops Sasuke **Ya big baby!

Sasuke: Am not..that turtle was freaky!

Naruto: Pfft yeah whatever your just a pansy!! Nah nah nah!!

Sasuke: **Eye twitches **

Naruto: eheheh you know I was just kidding right Teme?

Sasuke: **Sharingan appears**

Naruto: EEEEEEP!! RAMEN GODS HELP YOUR LOYAL SERVANT AND STRIKE THE DEMON BEFORE ME DOWN!! LET HIM FEEL YOU FIERY WRATH!!! ETC ETC!!

Sasuke: **Sharingan fades **You really are a dobe..Dobe

Naruto: What the hell did you just call me Teme?

Sasuke: Dobe, spelt D O B E, Definition: Naruto

Naruto: Why I oughta!!

Kiba: Ok dudes fighting is soo not excellent!

Neji: Yeah dudes listen to what he says...Violence is not the way..

Kiba: Oh my god are you going all pure and goodness on me!!

Neji: Naw dude it just seemed like the right moment to say that

Kiba oh ok then, you scared me..

Neji: Yeah well anyways we should probably head back now because I don't think we are ever gonna find the center of this maze.

Itachi: Yeah I agree

Gaara: I have a craving for a pickle..

**With the Blue Team**

Chouji: I don't **Munch **think we are getting to the **Munch **middle any time soon **Munch**

Zetsu: Oooooh it's nearly spring, I like spring I have pretty flowers, on me in spring. SPRING!!!

Deidara: Uh huh

Kisame: Deidara, I hate you

Deidara: Aw why Kisame?

Kisame: Because, un

Deidara: Un?

Kisame: Stop mocking me it was an accident!

Deidara: Oh so this annoys you, un

Kisame: Deidara I am soo warning you....

Deidara: Oh yeah?...un

(And that my loyal readers is how Deidara learned the secret of the un and how to piss off every Akatsuki member with just one word)

Shino: Oh my gosh it's a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a bug!

**Bug gets hit by a Kunai knife**

Tenten: **Smirks**

Shino: Tenten your insane!! You crazy donkey!!

Tenten: **?**

Shino: Yes thats right...Your a donkey!!

Tenten: Yeah whatever lets head back now..

Shino: Wait you platypus eating donkey I'm not finished with you yet!!!

**Everyone walks off **

Shino: Awww **Follows after them.**

**Last but least because they've got Karin, it's the Red Team **

Sai: Everybody clap **clap clap clap, **Everybody sing! LA LA LA LA LA!! Bow to your partner!! Then ya turn around.

Karin: Oh noes!!! My pickle!!

Gaara: **Randomly pops up **MY PICKLE!!! **Runs off **

Karin: NIOOOOOUU!!!

Kakashi: Well this sucks where are we?!?

Gai: I know! My youth sense is tingling follow me I'll get us back to the beach in a youthful flash!!

Kurenai: Yeah whatever just get me outta here the artsy kid is creeping me out!

Sai: Hands in the air! Rocka-a-bye your bear, bear's now asleep, Shh! Shh! Shh!

Anko: Well what are you waiting for move it maggots unless you want me to fling you into oblivion!!

Gai: Eeeep I'm on it A-a-anko!! **Salutes**

Anko: That's ma'am to you!!

Gai: Ma'am yes ma'am!!

Anko: Well lead the way!

**Two hours later on the random beach**

Caity: Ok the winner this round is the Fluro Green Team!!

Nae: Yes and now you can go into the secret room and vote for who you want to leave..oooooooo **Lights dim and Nae wiggles her fingers**

Caity: Nae stop that!

Nae: Awww man!

Caity: Ok Shikamaru your up first! Shikamaru?

**Shikamaru sprints up to the group**

Shikamaru: Sorry I fell in a hole near a rock shaped like a rubber chicken

Nae: So that's where I put my hole and my rock!

Caity: You used Naruto's inheritance again didn't you!

Nae: Maybe...

Naruto: Grr that shovel was my inheritance from my dad!!

Nae: Ahh **Runs away**

Naruto: **Chases Nae **

Caity: Ok while they're running lets begin voting your up first Shikamaru!

**Shikamaru walks into the room**

Shikamaru: I'm gonna vote off Shino because he put bugs up my nose when I was sleeping..It isn't my fault that I snore!! and..and..umm

**Nae whispers to Shikamaru**

Shikamaru: Oh yeah thanks Nae, and reason two his shoes are lame!

Caity: Ok next up is Temari

**Temari walks into the room **

Temari: I'm voting off Chouji, I found chip crumbs in my underwear, what is with that!! and reason two he stole another pair of my undies and wore em' on his head!! WHAT A FREAK!!!

Caity: Ok Kankuro you're next

**Kankuro walks into the room**

Kankuro: I am voting for Gaara because he has red hair

Caity: Kankuro you can't vote people of because of their hair colour

Kankuro: Fine he's a pansy that sings about lollipops and he wears makeup

**Outside**

Gaara: My boy lollipop!! You make my heart go giddy-up!

Caity: Ahem well I guess your next Ino

**Ino walks into the room**

Ino: I am voting for the frog!! He dissed my mum!! and he is constantly putting me down and I can't take it any more!! **Bursts into tears**

Caity: oooook next is Sasori

**Sasori walks in**

Sasori: I'm voting for Deidara, his newly found "un" is driving me insane and unless you all wanna die MAKE HIM LEAVE!!!

Deidara: **From outside **UN!!!!

Sasori:** Falls of the stool twitching**

Caity: Alright lucky last Lee

**Lee walks in**

Lee: Well it is very unyouthful of me but I want to vote for Choji I just don't like the way he sits there and doesn't do anything and he isn't very youthful.

Caity: Well the votes are in..The frog: one...Deidara: One....Gaara: One...Shino: One and ...Choji: Two....I'm sorry Choji it's time for you to leave....Choji? CHOJI?? THAT DUMB ASS HE LEFT ALREADY!!! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO DRAMATIC MOMENT!! DAMNIT BARRY!! **Points at the innocent pair of scissors again**

Nae: **Still being chased by Naruto **Review and let us know what you think

Caity: Yeah!! Please we haven't got many reviews and I feel so unloved!! Damnit Barry it's all your fault!! **Points and glares at the scissors**

Gaara: Do as they say or me and my pickle are coming after you!!!

**Insert cool/awesome theme music here! **

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**So thats it for another chappie sorry about the wait...I kinda forgot ehehehehe.....REVIEW PLEASE!! No-ones reviewing and it makes me sad...Do you want it to be your fault that I fell into a state of depression and couldn't eat cookies! It will be on your conscience for ever!!! Next one should be out in a couple of days so have no fear!**

Gaara: YEAH! PICKLE!!

Nae: Ok who gave him a pickle?

Karin: Hides

Caity: Eh who cares at least he's happy..

Gaara: PICKLE!! OH PICKLE!! YOU ARE MY PICKLE! MY ONLY PICKLE! YOU MAKE ME HAPPY WHEN SKIES ARE GREY!! YOU'LL NEVER KNOW DEAR HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU!! SO PLEASE DON'T TAKE MY PICKLE AWAY!!

Nae: Oh sweet pancakes...

Caity:** Brushes away tear** T-that w-was b-beautiful G-gaara! **Sobs**

Gaara:** Hugs pickle**


	6. Chapter 6

Caity: Hello!!!! I AM BACK!!! MUAHAHHAHA!!! Anywho! I have bitten off more than I can chew as usual! So if my updates come later, don't kill me!! PLEASE!!!

Naruto: She still don't own me! She still wishes she did!!

Caity: Yes, yes I do..

Naruto: Awww so you love me?

Caity: No....I enjoy all the violence that happens to you...

Sakura: **Cracks knuckles **Heh heh

Naruto: Eeep! HELP ME OH MIGHTY RAMEN GODS!!!

Sakura, Caity and Nae: O_O

On with the chapter!!

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**At the super secret kidnapper's aka Nae and Caity's place**

Caity: So what's our next challenge going to be?

Nae: PAINTBALL!!

Caity: WOOT!! AWESOME IDEA!!

Nae: So then..what are we waiting for?

Caity: Ok lets go!!

**At the super duper uber secret meeting place aka the random beach**

Tobi: Hey everybody!! Tobi is back!!!

Deidara: You weren't here?..un

Tobi: Noooo silly didn't you notice I wasn't here?

Deidara: No not really..nor did I care...un

Tobi: Naww Deidara-Sama you do love me!!! **Hugs Deidara**

Deidara: HELP ME!!!

Tobi: Silly DeiDei! Heheh **Releases poor Deidara **Anyways Tobi fell asleep under a palm tree and when Tobi woke up Tobi found that Tobi had been kidnapped be a horde of vicious penguins with pitchforks and fire on a stick (also known as a torch lolz)!!! Wow do you realise how many times Tobi managed to say Tobi in that sentence!!

Deidara: **Sweatdrop **

Gaara: **Sneaks away**

Shino: (Sings) ITSY BITSY SPIDER CLIMBED UP THE WATER SPOUT!!

Tenten: **Glares at Shino **

Shino:......

Tenten: That's right

Sasori: **Talking to a bunch of trees**....Ok team our time is now!! Tomorrow we attack!! And then all the fairy floss shall be mine!!!!

Nae: Never fear-

Caity:-the awesome is here!

Tobi: **Shakes head slowly **My catch phrase is so much better! TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!

Itachi: Puh-lease! Mine is so much better! IT'S JUST LIKE CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKE ONLY CRUNCHY!

Kisame: I AM BLUE!!

Zetsu: No one loves me...It's not easy being green..."

Everyone else: **Blink blink**

Zetsu: See?

Zetsu: It's okay Zetsu! I appreciate you!

Zetsu: Aww thank you Zetsu

Zetsu: Your welcome Zetsu

Nae: Well anyways after much thinking and deliberation we have decided that your next challenge shall be paintball. For every hit you get on another team you get 10 points and the team with the most points wins.

Caity: Yeah so here you go, the yellow team has yellow paint.....the green team has green paint...the blue team has blue paint.....and the red team has orange paint because red paint was too expensive for our budget.

Nae: So on your marks...get set...BANANA CAKE!!No? Fine..GO!

**With the blue team**

Kisame: So...

Tenten: Muahahhahaha! Die B*##$!!!!

Zetsu: Hey Zetsu do you think it was a good idea to give her any form of gun?

Zetsu: No, no I don't Zetsu...

Zetsu: Yeah I would of said something earlier but no one listens to me...

Zetsu: Aww Zetsu I'm here for you....

Shino: Oh look at that butterfly how pretty and- **SPLAT!**

Tenten: ehehheheheeh **Goes cross eyed **

Shino: She's going insane! Does anyone have any sedatives? A tranquilizer gun? Sleeping pills? A bat? Anything?

Chouji: I have a chip packet..

Deidara: Yeah nice, that'll knock her out...un

Kisame: argh! Stop it with the un already!!

Deidara: **Sings **Un! Un un un! Un-ity un-y un!

Kisame: grr

Deidara: **Snicker**......un

Tenten: Feel my fiery blue wrath motherf#$!*&!!!

Shino: Seriously, anything?

Tobi: **Hits Tenten on the head with his bat and knocks her out **TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!!

Shino:...sweet...Oh look a cockroach...

Deidara: Ahhhh! Kill it!! **Stomps on the cockroach**

Shino: **Glares**

**With the fluro green team**

Lee: The power of youth shall prevail once more! I shall win the ultimate prize! And take over the worl-uhm I mean win!!!

Sasori: Ok Squad Alpha move out! No? Damn lazy trees! Some evil, world dominating army they are...

Kankuro: Lets do this thing! I need to find Gaara so I can hit him! Bahahaha-

Temari: Oh lord..

Kankuro: **Cough cough -**ahahahhahha-

Ino:** Eyes glint evilly **Here froggy froggy **Loads gun**

Shikamaru: **Snore snore **Stay back....penguins....whisks! AHH!!

Temari: **0_o **What kinda person dreams about penguins and whisks?

Sasori: **Talking to a pile of rocks **Ok my new recruits, your now squad Delta! Squad Delta move out!......Lazy inanimate objects...have to do everything myself.....

Shikamaru: No..take Naruto...I taste..bad....**Snore snore**

Temari: Am I seriously the only one who's wondering what the hell he's dreaming about?

Kankuro: -ahahahhahahahhahahahhha-

Lee: Yes soon my pretties soon, soon the world will be ours-I mean soon I will win! Youth!

Kankuro: -ahahhahahahahahhahahaha ha ha ha ha!

Shikamaru: **Snore**

Temari: **Pokes Shikamaru with a stick **Hehe this is fun... **Poke poke **

Shikamaru: **Mumble mumble**

Temari: **Poke**

**With the yellow team**

Naruto: Whoo! Lets do this thing! YEAH!

Sakura: Shut up Naruto, do you want everyone to find us?

Naruto: Hell yeah! Then I can fend em' off and show Sasuke who's number one once and for all!

Sakura: We already know who's number one..

Naruto: Really?

Sakura: Yes, me! Now shut up!

Itachi: Pssst Sasuke?

Sasuke: Yeah Itachi?

Itachi: Turtle!

Sasuke: What! Where!

Itachi: Heh I can't believe you fell for that! So foolish..

Sasuke: I have your naked baby pictures...

Itachi:** Face pales **Where did you get those? I thought I burnt them all.

Sasuke: Nope here you wanna see?

Itachi: No! Not the one with me in the bath!

Sasuke: Take it back then

Itachi: Fine your not foolish..

Sasuke: and?

Itachi: and what?

Sasuke: **Whispers in Itachi's ear **

Itachi: No..

Sasuke: yes..

Itachi: Fine...I'm a smelly ass and I'm madly in love with Kisame..

Sasuke: **Collapses with hysterical laughter**

Itachi: Yeah your really mature aren't you?

Neji: Dude, and they say that were like on drugs...

Kiba: Yeah man I know..

Neji: Wanna go get some taco bell?

Kiba: Sure dude

Kiba and Neji: **Vanish and magically appear at Taco Bell where they order food and gossip about the latest episode of desperate housewives**

Itachi: Are we missing somebody?

Naruto: Nope I counted there are still six of us see...one...two....six....seventy-nine....see seven of us.

Itachi: **Slaps forehead with palm.**

**With the red team**

Karin: Aw man I hate orange..

Anko: So maggots, the enemy is tough and we need to be prepared! So lets go!

Gai, Kakashi and Asuma: **Runs in the opposite direction **

Anko: Where are you going the battle field is this way!

Kurenai: You better not be retreating!

Kakashi: **Shifty eyes **We're not retreating, we're advancing in a different direction!

Anko and Kurenai: **Narrow eyes**

Sai: So...what's going on?

Everyone: **Glares**

Sai: **Gulp**

Kurenai: and just where have you been young man?!?

Asuma: If I've said it once I've said it a thousand times, your not their mother....

Kureani: **Imitates Gaara's super scary death glare **Did you say something?

Asuma:...nope nothing what so ever!

Kurenai: Good boy...now where were you?!!

Sai: Well that's a funny story ya see I was just like walking along totally innocently when some scary looking Michael Jackson cross snake man jumps out of the bushes and is all like "Hello Sasuke..." and so I was like "I'm not Sasuke.." and he was like "Don't lie to me Sasuke..." and I was like "Look crazy guy! I'm not Sasuke!". Then I was running and running and then-

Kurenai: Sheesh I asked where you were not for your life story..

Sai: I was right around the corner didn't you hear me screaming?

Gai: That was you? I thought it was the youthful bird of youthfullness, it's actually an interesting story-

TWO HOURS LATER

Gai: -and then I decided to walk to the markets-

ANOTHER THREE HOURS LATER

Gai: -and in the end the wild bilby made it home to his mommy and lived **Sniff **happily ever after..

Sai: **Sniff, wipes away tear **That was a truly touching story...

Gai: I know..**Bursts into tears**

Karin: Losers...

**Back at the random beach**

Caity: was it just me or was Gaara missing for the entire episode?

Nae: I don't know...

Caity: Oh well, so that's it for another chapter, sorry for the long wait you know how it is countries to invade, hospitals and bakeries to give away and it's hard to get by on a teenagers salary!

Nae: Yeah! We don't even get paid hourly! What are all those teacher complaining about!

Caity: Yeah so same old, same old, you read, you review, you tell us who you wanna get rid of and what team you want to win this round and you get another chapter. Kapiesh?

Nae: Bye byes!


	7. Chapter 7

Nae: Three

Caity: Two

Nae: One

Caity: And..

Nae: Music! *Turns on radio, which starts playing 'I like to move it.'*

Caity: Hmmm...This doesn't appear to be working.....

Nae: No, no it doesn't.....

Lemurs: ....

Nae: Buuut, on 'Madagascar' they dance, why aren't they?? They even sang, but we were nice enough to supply the music....

Caity: We have been lied too!!! Fiends!!!

Nae: Bastards!!!

Caity: Light bulb brains!!

Nae: Chicken sandwiches!!!

-2 hours later-

Lemurs: *Raiding Caitys' cookie stash, who , along with Nae, is too busy coming up with the most insulting names possible*

Caity: Eeeh...uhh....gaaaah!!!

Nae: I thinks that's enough...their hearts should be shattered by now...

Caity: Whose hearts were we shattering??

Nae: You know what....I don't remember....

Caity: Hmmm...Hey is that Gaara??? And is he covered in BLOOD???

Nae: Hmmm....I think it was Professor Plum in the Study with the candle stick!!!

Caity: *rolls eyes* Umm Gaara, whats up with the blood...I didn't try to kill you in my sleep after you stole my cookies did I?

Gaara: Oh no, it would take too long to explain whose it is, considering it belongs to a few people...

Nae: 0.0

Caity: WHAT??!! HOLY BEEP!!! NAE, WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE RUNNING A GAME SHOW HERE, AND HERE WE ARE TRYING TO TEACH LEMURS HOW TO DANCE, MEANWHILE OUR CAPTI- I MEAN LUCKY PARTICIPANTS ARE DIEING!!!

Nae: Im on a game show?.....HI MUM AND DAD!!!! *waves into one of the random cameras*

Caity: Nae, we need to go, now!!! *Drags Nae*

Nae: Yes mum, Nae remembered to change her undies!! Bye!! Wait, Caity, we forgot the opening!!

Caity: *pauses* Oh em eff gee!!! You are right!!! Ahem, Welcome back to Naruto Survivor, the one and only game show were the participants die whilst the host sit back and eat cookies!

Nae: Uhhh, Caity, I don't have my radio or the theme song CD, I left it in the Lemur Dance School!!

Caity: Well, sing!

Nae: Umm....dun da duddytee da a blah, something something....

Caity: Good enough! *Continues pulling Nae along*

Gaara: *Grins mischievously and takes a tomato sauce bottle out of his pocket*

With the Fluro Green Team

*All huddled in a group, whispering*

Temari: Alright, so is everyone clear?

Lee: Yes Temari-san, your idea is so youthful, we are guaranteed to win!!!

Temari: Ok, any questions?

Kankuro: *Raises hand*

Temari: No? Ok, troops, set out!!! Waaaaait......Weres Sasori?

Wherever Sasori is

Sasori: Ok mountain! Your name is now Steve and you are my minion!

Steve: .....

Frog: Ribbet!

Sasori: Why good day Mr. Froggie! Are you too requesting to join? Excellent! That makes squad Charlie!

Frog: Ribbet! *hops behind Sasori*

Sasori: Now now Mr. Froggie, as a member of squad Charlie, you are to be fearless, courageous ....uhh....Fearless!!!

Frog: *points in horror at nearby bush*

Sasori: Ah! This bush will make a good addition to our squad will it Mr. Froggie? Ok, bush, your in, get over here! *gets hit with fluro green paint* Wah! It appears my allies believe me to be deserting them! Well, this means war!!! Steve, attack!!!

Steve: ....

Ino: *climbs out of bush, grinning sadistically* Sasori, pretty please move, you are blocking me from my....prey.....*cocks paintball gun*

Frog: *gulp*

With the Yellow Team

Naruto: *commando crawling, fully decked out in cameo, complete with makeup, performs complicated hand signs*

Sasuke: *crawling next to Naruto, lacking awesome cameo though cause he's a party pooper like that* Wha?

Naruto: *more complicated hand gestures*

Sasuke: *pulls middle finger*

Naruto: *rolls eyes* My poor, dear Sasuke, I was not talking about cheese burgers...

Sasuke: *confused look*

Naruto: I know how long we have been on this island and that you're probably longing for some decent food, but that is no excuse for mis-interpreting my perfectly clear hand signals...Do you know how long I've gone without ramen? But I still understand you perfectly...

Tenten: Stand up and put your hands in the air bitches!!!!

Naruto: *jumps up and sticks hands in the air, only to see Tenten holding up all of team red with her paintball gun, who were scheming to attack Naruto and Sasuke themselves*

Tenten: *Spots Naruto and Sasuke* Bahahaha!!! 10 people!!!!! 10!!!!!! I AM KICKING EVERYONES ARSES!!!! WOOOOOO!!!!!!

Frog: *bounces by...real fast* RIBBBBETT!!!!

Sasori: * Runs past* DAMN YOU STEVE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ino: *Chasing the frog* PREPARE TO DIE FROGGIE!!!!

Everyone else except Tenten: 0_o

Tenten: *sniggers and walks away*

Asuma: Phew, the demon lady is gone, lets go guys!

Karin: Umm we cant...that bitch tied us to the trees by our shoe laces!!!

Kurenia: Well, we will just have to untie ourselves, duh!

Asuma: I don't think we will be able to....

Anko: Whyyyyy?

Asuma: SHE USED A GIRL SCOUTS KNOT!!!!

Anko: Aaaaand how exactly do you know what a _girl _scouts knot looks like?

Asuma: *sniff* Its a long story...There we were, about to sneak into the girls camp when suddenly they attacked us like a pack of wild animals!!! All I remember is the growling, snarling and their glowing red eyes.....they strung us up by the ties that hold up our pants, using none other then the dreaded girl scouts knot! Annnd there we hung.....for an entire 2 minutes....I...I was mentally traumatised...little Johnny was never the same again...*Sits done and starts rocking backwards and forwards, hugging his knees*

Kurenai: ooooookkkkkk.....

Loud Speaker Thingo: Could all teams please make their way to the random beach! Thank you for shopping at polony sandwiches R us, pleas come again! Nae! Sowwy....

At the Random Beach

Nae: Hmmm....I believe us to be missing a hell of a lotta people...

Caity: Weeeell, I believe in the alien theory....

Nae: OMG!!! Really!!!! I do too!!!!

Caity: No...

Nae: No what?

Caity: *shifty eyes* No, I don't like pickled shrimp in my macaroni....

Nae: Umm, ok! I'll remember that!

Everyone else: 0.o......W.T.F???

Caity: Well, we appear to have all of the blue team except for...

Nae: Tenten

Caity: Yes, plus Sakura and Itachi...

Nae: Yes, Sakura and Itachi...

Caity: Could you not do that?

Nae: Do what?

Caity: That

Nae:What?

Caity: Nevermind...

Nae: What?

Caity: Hmm, where on this miserable island could they all be?

Nae: What? OMG!!!Look,is it a bird?

Caity: Or is it a plane?

Nae: No, its –

Caity & Nae: A FLYING SQUIRREL EATING TURKEY MONKEY!!!

Helicopter Loud Speaker: This is the army! We order you to surrender and release your hostages!

Nae: Hmm, close enough...Wow, they have a bigger loudspeaker then you Caity!

Caity: Those bastards!! Anyway, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! *Runs away*

**One extremely long and tiring chase later...**

In the Helicopter

Barry Mcgee: Caitlin and Renae. You have been placed under arrest for the following: Ninjaknapping, murder, robbery, failure to pay your bills on time, hosting an illegal game show on an island without sharing your cookies, harassing the natives, impersonating santa clause –

Nae: Once!!! Plus lotsa people do it...

Barry Mcgee: Impersonating the tooth fairy and stealing children's teeth which you then sold to the leprechauns, tying your shoes incorrectly, and –

Gaara: Hey Temari, I have a feeling we forgot something....

**Back on the island**

Kankuro: Heyy Temari? Gaara? Green guy? Anybody? Tem, face it, your trap isn't gonna work, can I not be the bait anymore? Guys?

Sasori: *Walks out of the bushes surrounded by natives, dressed up like their chief* Alright squad Tango! The island is ours, we did it!!!

Kankuro: Shit...

**Back on the helicopter**

Temari: Hmm, no, no I don't think so....

So everyone got off the island safely...exceeept Kankuro and Sasori, and as for Hinata and Chouji, well they turned up 2 months later in Spain. Meanwhile, Ino, Tenten and Asuma were sent to a mental institute. Sasuke later joined them after Itachi pushed him into the turtle tank at the zoo.

_In memory of Mr. Froggie._

_The great die young...He suffered the worst of fates...At the hands of a revenge-bent, psychopathical blonde..._

_

* * *

  
_

**Yeaaaah, well considering not many people seemed very interested in this...this...well, Caity and I decided we might as well finish it up. Dont like the ending? Too bad, we don't give a damn. Hey, at least we finished it and didn't just let it sit there to rot.....**


End file.
